Making history so its understood What do you call an IQ of 160 in the marines? Learn how your comment data is processed. } San Diego and its all good border-color: #CB2027; } III. 2) If it is an Air Force plane, it is 1500 hours. color: #fff; Not for the easily offended or politically correct. 3. Mmm Good! [1]Jokes 4 Us Marine Joke jQuery('#footnote_plugin_tooltip_5539_1_1').tooltip({ tip: '#footnote_plugin_tooltip_text_5539_1_1', tipClass: 'footnote_tooltip', effect: 'fade', predelay: 0, fadeInSpeed: 200, delay: 400, fadeOutSpeed: 200, position: 'top center', relative: true, offset: [-7, 0], });[2]AR15 Need some Marine joke jQuery('#footnote_plugin_tooltip_5539_1_2').tooltip({ tip: '#footnote_plugin_tooltip_text_5539_1_2', tipClass: 'footnote_tooltip', effect: 'fade', predelay: 0, fadeInSpeed: 200, delay: 400, fadeOutSpeed: 200, position: 'top center', relative: true, offset: [-7, 0], });[3]Ranker The Best Military Jokes jQuery('#footnote_plugin_tooltip_5539_1_3').tooltip({ tip: '#footnote_plugin_tooltip_text_5539_1_3', tipClass: 'footnote_tooltip', effect: 'fade', predelay: 0, fadeInSpeed: 200, delay: 400, fadeOutSpeed: 200, position: 'top center', relative: true, offset: [-7, 0], }). Hmm Good! and some rope. Why do the Marines have the lowest intelligence test entry standards of all the services? The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes on his way. The commander gives him the key and he opens the door, only to find behind it a door made of rubies. Ah 1, 2, 3, 4 The man sets about his task. We all know Marines eat crayons, but whats their favorite flavor of crayon? background:#CB2027; 40Marines, plus their LT. 15. Absolutely hated them. WebThe Marines will kill everybody inside and set up a headquarters. Sorry, there are a few minutes that you will never get back. A-one two, three, four! WebFunny 1. Here's the deal, ah here's my reply Tun Tavern in Philadelphia is where the first Marine Corps recruiting drive was held by the first commandant Samuel Nicholas, according to Marine tradition. "I sure am, kid," replies the Marine. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a Marine, how do I become one? } Learn All About Alaska Fishing Jobs. In the military, there are friendly rivalries between every branch and each has its own dose of elitism. .arqam-widget-counter .arq-rss small { So he removes his brain. How do you keep aMarinehappy in his old age? There are two types of people: Marines, and those that wish they were. Marine Corps Marine Corps ", My only gripe with this is the chant is 1, 2, 3, 4, I love the Marine Corps. .arqam-widget-counter.arq-outer-frame.arq-border-colored li a i { .postid-65275 #text-61{display:none;} You're not a Marine. Once again there is blood-curdling screaming and weeping. } When the Soldier returned with the coke, the Marine in the middle seat said, That looks good, I think Ill have one too.. Rod Powers was a retired Air Force First Sergeant with 22 years of active duty service. #text-66 { } color: #444; Ah put me up A Marine is on liberty in San Deigo and walks into a bar to have a drink. A sergeant was addressing a squad of 25 and said: I have a nice easy job for the laziest man here. } VetFriends has the best military humor on the web. In the beginning was the word, and the word was God. Encinitas, CA. Q: What is the primary mission of theMarines. js.src = "//forms.aweber.com/form/69/1702128069.js"; .arqam-widget-counter .arq-twitter small { } 151. had decided, that he had enough. Marine Corps PT, Drill ah all day long Crayonberry. Marine Corps It wasnt a joke, its really that bad. My grandmother was a Navy nurse during World War 2. The army grunts agreed and head out in a small dingy. Marine Corps I hit that. 16. An annotation cannot contain another annotation. Previous mottos of the Marine Corps were. background: #444; A visitor, returning to Kuwait for the first time since the Gulf War, was impressed by a social change. .postid-63227 .mejs-controls .mejs-horizontal-volume-slider .mejs-horizontal-volume-total { They were named the marine corpse, Interviewer to Marine Corpsman: "What is your stance on guns?" Marine Corps Its Gods job to forgive Bin Laden, its our job to arrange the meeting. -o-transition: background,opacity .3s ease-in-out; Your Corps! Ah Army, Navy was ah not for me }(document, "script", "aweber-wjs-f09dty4o4")); border-color: #4267B2; So God thinks and says:"This one should do it" and removes his testicles. Hmm Good! However, jokes about each of the services God is there being all happy like, wondering that he won yet again. He again heads down to s small ridge and they follow. The Soldier kicked off his shoes, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the Marine in the window seat said, I think Ill get up and get a coke. No problem, said the Soldier, Ill get it for you. While he was gone, the Marine picked up the Soldiers shoe and spit in it. Easy, just tell them CNN is two blocks over. Run to Cadence with the U.S. Marines, Vol. 1518. Marine Corps WebThe Marine emerges a couple minutes later and dusts himself off and again stands in the middle of the road. Aug 2018 - Present4 years 7 months. }); After serving in the Army for about four years, two young men head to their home state of Florida. He told them you must find your own way to this beach head for 0600 tomorrow morning, there you will be tested like never before. The Navy will turn out the lights and lock the doors. WebGeneral: Very good son, thats 70 inches which comes to 140 pounds Soldier 2: The tip of the finger on one outstretched hand to the tip of the other, sir!. Marine Corps He goes to the front gate and says to the sentry, "My car broke down. Web1: 1, 2, 3, 4 United States Marine Corps! background-color: transparent; Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Old breed new breed, near and far happy birthday wherever you are, the cadence ends. Don't let me down WebUnited States Marine Corps. Iwo Jima to a Guadalcanal God sees this and goes:"Huh, this guy wants to die, it seems. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. Web1-2-3-4 I Love the Marine Corps The United States Marine Corps - Topic 12.8K subscribers Subscribe 927 59K views 7 years ago Provided to YouTube by The Orchard font-size: 28px; Cannot annotate a non-flat selection. He called for his pipe and he called for his corporals three Push, Push, Push said the corporals Beer, Beer, Beer (Marine Corps!) Ah motivated and ah SEMPER FI Endorsements. This is just a preview! Army Navy was not for me (Marine Corps!) (1) To the Shores of Tripoli, adopted in 1805. Aug 2018 - Present4 years 7 months. All around text-decoration: none; } Marine=MusclesAreRequired,IntelligenceNotEssential. line-height: 15px; 1, 2, 3, 4, United States Marine Corps! A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a U.S. Marine Corps base. Come on now I'm gonna sing ya' some more 1, 2, 3, 4, I love the Marine Corps! speak: none; This hatred? By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. We advise troops not to use them outside of the service. ir Force was just ah to easy Did you hear about the patriotic zombie who wanted to serve his country? height: 50px; This spitting in shoes and peeing in cokes?. Note: When you embed the widget in your site, it will match your site's styles (CSS). U.S. Army Jokes. border: 1px solid #eee; As the plane was landing, the Soldier slipped his feet into his shoes and knew immediately what had happened. Marine Corps To anybody who asks me why } WebFind and save ideas about marine corps humor on Pinterest. He joined the Marine Corpse. margin: 8px auto; Marine Corps border-radius: 50px; padding: 0 0 7px; Ah 1, 2, 3, 4 Marine Corps Marine Corps I have fought for the love of God, country, and the Corps. border-color: #3f729b; You're not a Marine.". position: fixed !important; I am fully aware this is complaining and doesnt solve WebNov 7, 2018 - Explore Randy Olivaz's board "Marine Corps Humor", followed by 119 people on Pinterest. 60. The Soldier is also a citizen. .arqam-widget-counter.arq-outer-frame.arq-border-colored li.arq-pinterest a i { And AGAIN the Marine emerges and dusts himself off. .arqam-widget-counter li span { A. I tried to get in theMarineCorps, but couldnt pass the final exam.No matter how hard I tried I couldnt fit my head in that jar. I believe the residenti Luke Smith: It's great that you pointed out how an electrician would dou Rae Mola: Hi Vee, Thank you for your comment. There comes a day in every year of pride we shed a tear, the cadence goes. Make sure your selection Ah pump it up WebUnited States Marine Corps. Oh yeah! Rae Mola: Hi Bella, Thank you for your comment and suggestion. Second phase started to come around Marine Corps background:#cc181e; Get goofy look on your face, point upward, and make unintelligible grunting noises. Before they leave, the man at the counter tells them that a couple of marines have recently headed out to the swamp a couple of hours ago to get some alligator boots just like them and to keep an eye out for them in case they were lost. Touch device users, explore by touch or with swipe gestures. This is just a preview! Don't let me down 1-2-3-4 (Marine Corps!) ", The Marines reply, "You must go to the Marine Corps Recruit Depot at Parris Island and undergo several weeks of torturous training. console.warn('PixelYourSite: no pixel configured. narr/ref a is mco p1400.32d w/ch 2, enlisted promotion manual. -ms-transition: background,opacity .3s ease-in-out; 16. 15. Two Marines boarded a quick shuttle flight out of Dallas, headed for Houston. "Are you a real live Army paratrooper? .rll-youtube-player, [data-lazy-src]{display:none !important;}. Ah 1, 2, 3, 4 A platoon. You are now a Marine. google_ad_client: "ca-pub-4440662698983836", They ask the guy working there for the necessary equipment, some bait, a net, and some rope. 4) If it is an Army aircraft, the big hand is on the 12 and the little hand is on the 3. .arqam-widget-counter ul { However, jokes about each of the services by every other branch are as common as grunts making fun of POGs (People Other Than Grunts).Here is a classic U.S. Marines joke. How do you knock out aMarinewhile he is drinking water? .arqam-widget-counter li { The Air Force will take out a 5 year lease with an option to buy. ref c is maradmin 025/23, rescission of covid-19 vaccination requirement. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. WebMilitary jokes for the Army, Navy, Air Force, Marine Corps, and Coast Guard. Second phase started to come around #text-63 { He created the sun, and the moon, and the stars, so that light might pierce the darkness. Making history so its understood God looks and is confused:"What in my name is happening?" 10. 11. Fun fact: we deliver faster than Amazon. A. To his surprise, the Marines accept him enthusiastically. The Soldier kicked off his shoes, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the Marine in the window seat said, I think Ill get up and get a coke. No problem, said the Soldier, Ill get it for you., While he was gone, the Marine picked up the Soldiers shoe and spit in it. starts and ends within the same node. 12. starts and ends within the same node. I'm dying to know. This fighting between our services? color: #333; Marine Corps In the beginning was God, and all else was darkness and void, and without form. the firstmarinesays, those are deer tracks. second disagrees them are elk tracks the third disagrees with both of themthose are moose tracksthey were still arguing when the train hit them. WebQuotes tagged as "marines" Showing 1-30 of 74 The soldier is the Army. } Note: When you embed the widget in your site, it will match your site's styles (CSS). WebJan 7, 2016 - Marine - Funny Quotes. enable_page_level_ads: true Ideas for the top 16 marine jokes were taken from the following sources. So God created the heavens and the Earth. You will learn how to act the Corps, breathe the Corps, eat the Corps, sleep the Corps, be the Corps. WebTHE Marine Corps Version of Genesis 1. Oh yeah! ref d is maradmin 334/20, forthcoming changes to mco p1400.32d, marine corps promotion manual volume 2, enlisted 13. III Album, 1, 2, 3, 4 United States Marine Corps! Ah 1, 2, 3, 4 The Marines will kill everybody inside and set up a headquarters. The Marines I have seen around the world have the cleanest bodies, the filthiest minds, the highest morale, and the lowest morals of any group of animals I have ", "Yes, I am," answers the paratrooper. Tell me now what you waiting for Ah put me up Marine Corps, U.S. Marine Corps Lyrics provided by SongLyrics.com. I need a life that is harcore Marine Corps! Emily, Leader of The Joyful Stepmom, (function(d, s, id) { when was the first marine corps birthday ball, the Marine Corps has created its first ever birthday running cadence, Women in the military: Moving beyond firsts, Veterans Affairs drops mask requirement for all agency medical offices, How the Marine Corps is preparing for era of contested logistics, Healthy eating on a budget for busy military spouses, The impossible choice facing many of Americas military families, Tax scams How to report them Money Minute, Capitol Hill weighs action on two controversial topics: medical marijuana and abortion, Lockheed wins hypersonics contract | Defense Dollars, Go inside a secret nuclear fallout bunker sealed for decades, Pentagon orders engine vibration fix for entire F-35 fleet worldwide, Dismissal of 3rd MARSOC 3 defendants case to be weighed by court, Marines remove scout sniper platoons from infantry battalions, 58 Marines reenlist early, on Iwo Jima anniversary. Click here to read what else I learned from my father-in-law, Chuck Brown. Join our discord: https://discord.gg/jokes, Press J to jump to the feed. He stops for a second, but keeps going, chanting the same thing. font-style: normal; Marine Corps border-color: #45b0e3; What did Holly Holm say to What has 82 legs and an I.Q. 2. I'll be a MARINE till the day that I die Ah put me up Its not an attitude problem, we are that good. What do you call a Marine with an open head wound? Although I never heard Chuck tell a joke, I believe he would enjoy the following jokes and puns about his beloved Corps. Left, right, left, right, left, right, left To ensure the Army doesnt get their feet wet. 2, 2023 at 8:47 PM PST | Updated: moments ago. font-size: 21px; The Army on the other hand is for occupation and stability, using heavier fire power and armor units. Marine Corps 12. ref d is maradmin 334/20, forthcoming changes to mco p1400.32d, marine corps promotion manual volume 2, enlisted I need a life that is harcore .postid-65275 #shr_canvas2{display:none;} color: #000 !important; .arqam-widget-counter.arq-outer-frame li a i { ~ Eleanor Roosevelt, First Lady of the United States, 1945. What do you call a Marine with an open head wound? The Marine hurries out of the bathroom and catches up with the guy. You wanna suck my dick? Marine Corps Marine Corps Web4. Marine Corps by The U.S. Marines. Ah Army, Navy was ah not for me MARINES - My Ass Rides In Naval Equipment, Sir. A: Throw some sand on railroad tracks and tell him to Hit the Beach!, 7. I think its time that we do it again (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({ .arqam-widget-counter li a i { WebWhen Frank Manteau joined the Marine Corps in 1995, the eating crayons joke didnt exist quite yet. In fact, the highest obligation and privilege of citizenship is that of bearing arms for ones country George S. Patton Jr. font-size: 21px; Was looking for the best candidate to fill a spot on a field team. var js, fjs = d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0]; moz-border-radius: 50px; 3. margin-bottom: 0px; In 1995, Gerardo Campbell married into a blended family, becoming the stepdad to his wifes two children. What do you call an IQ of 160 in the marines? He thinks a little and removes his heart. Well I am going to be a dong and make him die in a most roundabout way". 11. Air Force was just too easy (Marine Corps!) 5. Every branch that completes jump school gets a red beret and a marine would never call it a hat. General Electric T-700 engine mechanic. Make sure your selection Jokes aside, thank you to all the men and women who served in America's armed forces. Marine Corps A decision by the Marine Corps to get rid of its scout sniper program as part of a restructuring of its infantry battalions is drawing criticism. (WNDU) - Seventy-three years later, a Michigan City Marine Corps Veteran is recognized for his service. .arqam-widget-counter.arq-col2 li a, .arqam-widget-counter.arq-col3 li a { III, Double Time, MARCH ir Force was just ah to easy A young boy sees a Marine wearing his dress uniform in a restaurant. Marine Corps Images, GIFs and videos featured seven times a day. To mark its birthday, the Marine Corps has created its first ever birthday running cadence, honoring Marine history and celebrating 244 years of service by Marines past and present. USMC: When it absolutely, positively must be destroyed overnight. While the cadence doesnt inspire making the grass grow or running to Iraq in one day, it is full of imagery that will be familiar to all Marines. the first marine says, those are deer tracks. second disagrees them are elk tracks the During the Vietnam war, a Lieutenant asked a Marine why he was falling back during a really fierce battle. Jacksonville, North Carolina, United States. How long must this go on? the Soldier asked. In the navy, in the navy! Graduation standing tall in my green js = d.createElement(s); js.id = id; Come on now I'm gonna sing ya' some more When he is done, he travels over to the sink and begins to wash his hands. 1, 2, 3, 4, I love the Marine Corps! My Corps! Some years later, the same man again breaks down in front of the same Marine Corps base. To err is human, to forgive is divine, however, neither is Marine Corps policy. He becomes a marine. To anybody who asks me why In 10 November when it began in a tavern they laid the plan.. (2) Fortitudine or fortitude adopted in 1812 (both were used) (3) From the Halls of Montezuma to the Shores of Tripoli, adopted in 1848. But as the man tries to fall asleep that night, he hears a strange sound. What I needed was a little bit more .postid-65275 #text-html-widget-11{display:none;} Tagged with: Chuck Brown Marine Corps Sergeant Major, Your email address will not be published. Standing there in his dress uniform, he says, "I have joined the Corps, and I have paid my dues. What I need was a little bit more Marine Corps Required fields are marked *. [This is about the Army National Guard: not the regular Army. 13. Marine Corps 14. In the military, there are friendly rivalries between every branch and each has its own dose of elitism. What I need was a little bit more To mark its birthday, the Marine Corps has created its first ever a birthday running cadence, honoring Marine history and celebrating 244 years of service by background:#4267B2; In 2011, he started Support for Stepfathers to reverse the nearly 70% divorce rate for blended families in the US. Didnt you hear me say that were outnumbered 4 to 1 ? The Marine replied, I got my four Sir., 9. Beirut, Lebanon I think it's time that we get it done border-color: #cc181e; Marine Corps Corpsman: "Usually behind them". What did Holly Holm say to Ronda Rousey's date to the Marine Corps Ball? 2) In a war-game consisting of Army and Marine units, an Army Captain and company commander is tasked with seizing a hilltop from a Marine platoon. #af-form-1702128069 ul, #af-form-1702128069 ol { Tun Tavern to the Bella Woods ref b is mco 5000.14d, marine corps administrative procedures (mcap). All around In effort to control procurement costs, the Pentagon decides to standardize coffee cups across all the services. color: #444; I think its time that we do it again * United States Marine Corps Birthday: 10 NOVEMBER 1775 * 1) Best haircut. He unlocks the door and turns the knob, and behind that door, he is amazed to find the source of the strange sound.